what do we have? Time limited punishments. Sounds worse, doesn't it? And in a way, it is. Thus, from this doll's view point then, injuries and wrong doings should not be explained away. Rather, they should be punishable by some measure of temporary suffering. Jail sentences. Institutions. Not speaking to each other for a week. Anyway you cut it though, someone has to pay. At least temporarily. In other words, unlike Doll Number Two who thinks the way to deal with the suffering in the world is to look at it logically from a distance, Doll Number Three thinks this is avoiding the truth. And that when something painful happens, the wrong doer needs to suffer. Nothing permanent, mind you. But something painful nonetheless.

As for whether this is actual a step in the wrong direction, while many people would see these ur

Emergence Personality Theory is the first non linear theory of personality, the first to be based entirely on fractals. Here, personality is said to begin with the birth separation moment, during which the first of the many fractal structures of personality is formed.

What is this structure like? It is a nested set of four layers which biases us away from the pain of disconnects and outward toward the painlessness of personal non existence. This is why it is sometimes pictured as a set of ten Russian nesting dolls, and sometimes as a ten layered onion.

Essentially then, Emergence Personality Theory posits personality as a developmentally occurring system of interdependent, nested, fractal layers. Ten nested layers in all. Each of which functions much like a view point from which to see and sense ourselves and our world.

Now if you picture the ten dolls still all nested together (something like how I've drawn them in the upper right corner of this chapter's diagram), from this perspective, all you would see is Doll Number One's perspective, the state of personal non existence. How does it feel to see life from this perspective?

Basically, this is the state in which we keep everything inside. Or in other words, the state in which we have yet to open up. Even to ourselves. How do we do this? By doing things to zone out. So much so in fact that even when we have an injury, from Doll Number One's perspective, we see nothing to worry about and feel nothing's wrong. And this is not too difficult to imagine really. After all, we have yet to open up and so, all we see is what shows on the outside.

Almost all therapies get people to open up Doll Number One. And when they do, we get access to Doll Number Two's view point. What is life like from this doll's perspective like?

For Doll Number Two's perspective, we see life through the eyes of the philosopher, therapist, politician, and religious person. Which means what exactly? Which means we get to see life a lot more clearly than Doll Number One sees it. At least as far as having something in common with other human beings. The thing is, the view from this barely open place is more about making generalizations about life than anything genuinely personal. Theories and rules rather than personal choices.

In a way, we could say that from Doll Number Two's perspective, life is something to be explained and understood. With cool, logical detachment. In essence then, from this view point, we try to make sense of life by looking at our suffering from a distance. Which is why this doll, Doll Number Two, can use punishing questions, explanations, and excuses for not punishing as the route to understanding her suffering and wrong doings. And the suffering and wrong doings of others. All the while never realizing that to explore suffering with cool logical detachment means we can totally miss the more human, warm side of life.

A lot of cognitive behavioral therapies are Layer Two view points. Cool, logical explanations for the suffering is life. And while they are indeed an improvement over the zoned out non existence of Doll Number One, nonetheless, at this point, we still have a great distance to travel before we reach healing. A journey which can only lead inward. A layer at a time.

Open the next doll and what do we have? Time limited punishments. Sounds worse, doesn't it? And in a way, it is. Thus, from this doll's view point then, injuries and wrong doings should not be explained away. Rather, they should be punishable by some measure of temporary suffering. Jail sentences. Institutions. Not speaking to each other for a week. Anyway you cut it though, someone has to pay. At least temporarily. In other words, unlike Doll Number Two who thinks the way to deal with the suffering in the world is to look at it logically from a distance, Doll Number Three thinks this is avoiding the truth. And that when something painful happens, the wrong doer needs to suffer. Nothing permanent, mind you. But something painful nonetheless.

As for whether this is actual a step in the wrong direction, while many people would see these ur

.

Now if you picture the ten dolls still all nested together (something like how I've drawn them in the upper right corner of this chapter's diagram), from this perspective, all you would see is Doll Number One's perspective, the state of personal non existence. How does it feel to see life from this perspective?

Basically, this is the state in which we keep everything inside. Or in other words, the state in which we have yet to open up. Even to ourselves. How do we do this? By doing things to zone out. So much so in fact that even when we have an injury, from Doll Number One's perspective, we see nothing to worry about and feel nothing's wrong. And this is not too difficult to imagine really. After all, we have yet to open up and so, all we see is what shows on the outside.

Almost all therapies get people to open up Doll Number One. And when they do, we get access to Doll Number Two's view point. What is life like from this doll's perspective like?

For Doll Number Two's perspective, we see life through the eyes of the philosopher, therapist, politician, and religious person. Which means what exactly? Which means we get to see life a lot more clearly than Doll Number One sees it. At least as far as having something in common with other human beings. The thing is, the view from this barely open place is more about making generalizations about life than anything genuinely personal. Theories and rules rather than personal choices.

In a way, we could say that from Doll Number Two's perspective, life is something to be explained and understood. With cool, logical detachment. In essence then, from this view point, we try to make sense of life by looking at our suffering from a distance. Which is why this doll, Doll Number Two, can use punishing questions, explanations, and excuses for not punishing as the route to understanding her suffering and wrong doings. And the suffering and wrong doings of others. All the while never realizing that to explore suffering with cool logical detachment means we can totally miss the more human, warm side of life.

A lot of cognitive behavioral therapies are Layer Two view points. Cool, logical explanations for the suffering is life. And while they are indeed an improvement over the zoned out non existence of Doll Number One, nonetheless, at this point, we still have a great distance to travel before we reach healing. A journey which can only lead inward. A layer at a time.

Open the next doll and what do we have? Time limited punishments. Sounds worse, doesn't it? And in a way, it is. Thus, from this doll's view point then, injuries and wrong doings should not be explained away. Rather, they should be punishable by some measure of temporary suffering. Jail sentences. Institutions. Not speaking to each other for a week. Anyway you cut it though, someone has to pay. At least temporarily. In other words, unlike Doll Number Two who thinks the way to deal with the suffering in the world is to look at it logically from a distance, Doll Number Three thinks this is avoiding the truth. And that when something painful happens, the wrong doer needs to suffer. Nothing permanent, mind you. But something painful nonetheless.

As for whether this is actual a step in the wrong direction, while many people would see these ur

le to open up Doll Number One. And when they do, we get access to Doll Number Two's view point. What is life like from this doll's perspective like?

For Doll Number Two's perspective, we see life through the eyes of the philosopher, therapist, politician, and religious person. Which means what exactly? Which means we get to see life a lot more clearly than Doll Number One sees it. At least as far as having something in common with other human beings. The thing is, the view from this barely open place is more about making generalizations about life than anything genuinely personal. Theories and rules rather than personal choices.

In a way, we could say that from Doll Number Two's perspective, life is something to be explained and understood. With cool, logical detachment. In essence then, from this view point, we try to make sense of life by looking at our suffering from a distance. Which is why this doll, Doll Number Two, can use punishing questions, explanations, and excuses for not punishing as the route to understanding her suffering and wrong doings. And the suffering and wrong doings of others. All the while never realizing that to explore suffering with cool logical detachment means we can totally miss the more human, warm side of life.

A lot of cognitive behavioral therapies are Layer Two view points. Cool, logical explanations for the suffering is life. And while they are indeed an improvement over the zoned out non existence of Doll Number One, nonetheless, at this point, we still have a great distance to travel before we reach healing. A journey which can only lead inward. A layer at a time.

Open the next doll and what do we have? Time limited punishments. Sounds worse, doesn't it? And in a way, it is. Thus, from this doll's view point then, injuries and wrong doings should not be explained away. Rather, they should be punishable by some measure of temporary suffering. Jail sentences. Institutions. Not speaking to each other for a week. Anyway you cut it though, someone has to pay. At least temporarily. In other words, unlike Doll Number Two who thinks the way to deal with the suffering in the world is to look at it logically from a distance, Doll Number Three thinks this is avoiding the truth. And that when something painful happens, the wrong doer needs to suffer. Nothing permanent, mind you. But something painful nonetheless.

As for whether this is actual a step in the wrong direction, while many people would see these ur

make sense of life by looking at our suffering from a distance. Which is why this doll, Doll Number Two, can use punishing questions, explanations, and excuses for not punishing as the route to understanding her suffering and wrong doings. And the suffering and wrong doings of others. All the while never realizing that to explore suffering with cool logical detachment means we can totally miss the more human, warm side of life.

A lot of cognitive behavioral therapies are Layer Two view points. Cool, logical explanations for the suffering is life. And while they are indeed an improvement over the zoned out non existence of Doll Number One, nonetheless, at this point, we still have a great distance to travel before we reach healing. A journey which can only lead inward. A layer at a time.

Open the next doll and what do we have? Time limited punishments. Sounds worse, doesn't it? And in a way, it is. Thus, from this doll's view point then, injuries and wrong doings should not be explained away. Rather, they should be punishable by some measure of temporary suffering. Jail sentences. Institutions. Not speaking to each other for a week. Anyway you cut it though, someone has to pay. At least temporarily. In other words, unlike Doll Number Two who thinks the way to deal with the suffering in the world is to look at it logically from a distance, Doll Number Three thinks this is avoiding the truth. And that when something painful happens, the wrong doer needs to suffer. Nothing permanent, mind you. But something painful nonetheless.

As for whether this is actual a step in the wrong direction, while many people would see these ur

what do we have? Time limited punishments. Sounds worse, doesn't it? And in a way, it is. Thus, from this doll's view point then, injuries and wrong doings should not be explained away. Rather, they should be punishable by some measure of temporary suffering. Jail sentences. Institutions. Not speaking to each other for a week. Anyway you cut it though, someone has to pay. At least temporarily. In other words, unlike Doll Number Two who thinks the way to deal with the suffering in the world is to look at it logically from a distance, Doll Number Three thinks this is avoiding the truth. And that when something painful happens, the wrong doer needs to suffer. Nothing permanent, mind you. But something painful nonetheless.

As for whether this is actual a step in the wrong direction, while many people would see these urges as less sane and civil, in truth, these folks are taking a step in the right direction. In the direction of being more honest and real about their suffering. Which is why this kind of opening up moves us closer yet to healing.

Open up the next doll and what do you see? You see inside of Doll Number Four. The doll of eternal punishments. Eternal punishments! Whoa! Sound like insanity, doesn't it. It's not. And it's perfectly human to feel this way. As in, "you hurt my friend and you should burn in hell forever!" Whoa. Forever is a long time; yes?

Again, many people, including a whole lot of therapists, see this step forward as a step backward. Or at least as that people are getting less civilized. And more crazy. And they are. At the same time, honestly admitting we feel these kinds of feelings is a whole magnitude more truthful as far as what we really feel about having been injured. As in, we get injured. We act badly. Or at least, we feel urges to act badly.

The thing is, when a therapist gets us to the level of Doll Number Four, we are really making progress. Is it messy? Yes. And even a bit scary at times. After all, we don't know much about this side of ourselves. Why? Because we mostly spend life in Layer One or Two. Nice, calm, civil detachment. Pleasant, yes. But light years away from where we need to go to heal.

So yes, seeing this hell come out of us can be a real mind blower. This is what we really feel inside. "Maybe I don't really want to know." Still, this scary person is the real "wounded" us, and being more honest about what this feels like can only be a good thing. If, of course, we are talking about doing this in therapy and not out there in the real world.

What comes out of the next doll then?

[to read the full version of this discussion, click here]