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Suggest You - Six Tips for Confronting Negative Behaviors
Preparing for a job interview is an area that job searchers typically don’t do well. In my experience as a recruiter, I have dealt with many people who work really hard to make it to the interview stage and then get lazy.Trying to wing it during an interview – just showing up and expecting to think of answers off the top of your head – is no way to prepare for a job interview.Properly preparing for a job interview is what sets successful job searche
Be prepared - Pre-plan what you intend to say. In most situations, I don’t suggest that you read a prepared statement. However, you should be prepared.
Be brief – Get to the point quickly, and stay on topic. You will find it easier to be brief if you prepare in advance.
Be specific - Make sure you speak about specific behaviors - not your interpretations.
Here are some examples:
- Rude, inconsiderate,
Remember the poor little bird in P. D. Eastman's much beloved children's book Are You My Mother? The one who hatches from his egg while his mother is out scratching around for food and can't figure out who he is? By the middle of the story, this confused hatchling is in the midst of a full-blown identity crisis, wandering around asking everyone, "Are you my mother?"That's how it is in the business world. We bandy around the words freelancer, consultant,
I normally emphasize the benefits of encouraging positive, productive behaviors over punishing negative ones. However, my clients and seminar participants often ask questions like:
- “What about team members who don’t want to play nice?” or
- “What if I can’t find anything positive to reinforce?”
The short answer is this: “Confront negative behaviors early and decisively.”
When you fail to confront negative behaviors, you subtly signal acceptance of them. In effect, you encourage them to continue. As Admiral William F. Halsey said, “All problems become smaller if you don’t dodge them, but confront them.”
Personally, I prefer encouraging people to disciplining them. Encouragement is more comfortable to me - therein lays the problem. Encouragement is more comfortable to me. Any time I act out of personal comfort rather than appropriateness of response, I fail in my leadership role.
For about 10 or 20 per cent of the population, confronting problem behaviors is a no-brainer. These people are comfortable with confrontation. They do it naturally. However, the rest of us feel some stress and discomfort in a conflict situation.
My desire for peace and harmony sometimes stops me from quickly confronting negative behaviors. The paradox is this. As the leader of a team, if I do not address negative behaviors, I will get more of them. And, in the end, I will have less peace and harmony. In order to get what I do want, I have to do what I do not want to do.
Most people have a list of negative behaviors they have seen in the workplace. Here is a partial list of some behaviors/issues I have had to address:
- Interrupting meetings
- Supervisors treating employees poorly
- Employees verbally attacking each other
- Extreme body odor
- Lack of attention in meetings
- Too many personal phone calls at work
- And many others.
For people who, like me, would rather avoid a confrontation, I offer these suggestions to ease the stress:
Be prepared - Pre-plan what you intend to say. In most situations, I don’t suggest that you read a prepared statement. However, you should be prepared.
Be brief – Get to the point quickly, and stay on topic. You will find it easier to be brief if you prepare in advance.
Be specific - Make sure you speak about specific behaviors - not your interpretations.
Here are some examples:
- Rude, inconsiderate,
The No List Virus is spreading rapidly at retail store check out counters across the country. Common responses to customer questions by store clerks are a follow:1. No, you can’t use that coupon. It has expired. 2. No, that item is not on sale. I don’t care what the store flyer says. 3. No, we don’t carry that here. 4. No, we can’t order it for you. 5. No, you can’t order less than a pound. 6. No, the manager is not available.
When you fail to confront negative behaviors, you subtly signal acceptance of them. In effect, you encourage them to continue. As Admiral William F. Halsey said, “All problems become smaller if you don’t dodge them, but confront them.”
Personally, I prefer encouraging people to disciplining them. Encouragement is more comfortable to me - therein lays the problem. Encouragement is more comfortable to me. Any time I act out of personal comfort rather than appropriateness of response, I fail in my leadership role.
For about 10 or 20 per cent of the population, confronting problem behaviors is a no-brainer. These people are comfortable with confrontation. They do it naturally. However, the rest of us feel some stress and discomfort in a conflict situation.
My desire for peace and harmony sometimes stops me from quickly confronting negative behaviors. The paradox is this. As the leader of a team, if I do not address negative behaviors, I will get more of them. And, in the end, I will have less peace and harmony. In order to get what I do want, I have to do what I do not want to do.
Most people have a list of negative behaviors they have seen in the workplace. Here is a partial list of some behaviors/issues I have had to address:
- Interrupting meetings
- Supervisors treating employees poorly
- Employees verbally attacking each other
- Extreme body odor
- Lack of attention in meetings
- Too many personal phone calls at work
- And many others.
For people who, like me, would rather avoid a confrontation, I offer these suggestions to ease the stress:
Be prepared - Pre-plan what you intend to say. In most situations, I don’t suggest that you read a prepared statement. However, you should be prepared.
Be brief – Get to the point quickly, and stay on topic. You will find it easier to be brief if you prepare in advance.
Be specific - Make sure you speak about specific behaviors - not your interpretations.
Here are some examples:
- Rude, inconsiderate,
In our increasingly global economy, English is rapidly becoming the international language of business. This is obviously a reflection not only of historical circumstances, but also of the strength of the US economy: global players are only really global if they have a slice of the American pie. There are a lot of executives working in global teams who struggle with English, and the wise boss will try hard to put this right. Either you hire only those who have go
For about 10 or 20 per cent of the population, confronting problem behaviors is a no-brainer. These people are comfortable with confrontation. They do it naturally. However, the rest of us feel some stress and discomfort in a conflict situation.
My desire for peace and harmony sometimes stops me from quickly confronting negative behaviors. The paradox is this. As the leader of a team, if I do not address negative behaviors, I will get more of them. And, in the end, I will have less peace and harmony. In order to get what I do want, I have to do what I do not want to do.
Most people have a list of negative behaviors they have seen in the workplace. Here is a partial list of some behaviors/issues I have had to address:
- Interrupting meetings
- Supervisors treating employees poorly
- Employees verbally attacking each other
- Extreme body odor
- Lack of attention in meetings
- Too many personal phone calls at work
- And many others.
For people who, like me, would rather avoid a confrontation, I offer these suggestions to ease the stress:
Be prepared - Pre-plan what you intend to say. In most situations, I don’t suggest that you read a prepared statement. However, you should be prepared.
Be brief – Get to the point quickly, and stay on topic. You will find it easier to be brief if you prepare in advance.
Be specific - Make sure you speak about specific behaviors - not your interpretations.
Here are some examples:
- Rude, inconsiderate,
Have you ever found yourself wondering if you are in the right job? Or if there is some other job out there that might be a better fit? To find out take our quiz.The alarm goes off on Monday morning. . .A. You leap out of bed! Because Monday is your favorite day!B. You switch off the snooze button on your alarm at least 3 or 4 times then roll out of bed and attempt to brush your teeth and hair at the same time so that you are not la
Most people have a list of negative behaviors they have seen in the workplace. Here is a partial list of some behaviors/issues I have had to address:
- Interrupting meetings
- Supervisors treating employees poorly
- Employees verbally attacking each other
- Extreme body odor
- Lack of attention in meetings
- Too many personal phone calls at work
- And many others.
For people who, like me, would rather avoid a confrontation, I offer these suggestions to ease the stress:
Be prepared - Pre-plan what you intend to say. In most situations, I don’t suggest that you read a prepared statement. However, you should be prepared.
Be brief – Get to the point quickly, and stay on topic. You will find it easier to be brief if you prepare in advance.
Be specific - Make sure you speak about specific behaviors - not your interpretations.
Here are some examples:
- Rude, inconsiderate,
IntroductionFor every industry or business, to get increased sales and better name amongst consumers and fellow companies it is important to maintain a level of quality. Especially for the businesses engaged in export business has to sustain a high level of quality to ensure better business globally. Generally quality control standards for export are set strictly, as this business is also holds the prestige of the country, whose company is doing the export
Be prepared - Pre-plan what you intend to say. In most situations, I don’t suggest that you read a prepared statement. However, you should be prepared.
Be brief – Get to the point quickly, and stay on topic. You will find it easier to be brief if you prepare in advance.
Be specific - Make sure you speak about specific behaviors - not your interpretations.
Here are some examples:
- Rude, inconsiderate, disrespectful, arrogant, obnoxious, flighty, unfocused, smart aleck, and pushy are interpretations.
- Interrupting, rolling eyes, speaking loudly (or softly), shrugging shoulders, looking away, walking away, and tone of voice are specific behaviors.
Explain the impact - Tell the person how other people perceive their behavior or how it affects team performance.
State the desired alternative – Go beyond a description of the negative behavior to describe what you expect in the future. By stating the desired positive behavior, you can use positive reinforcement rather than punishment to drive performance in the future.
Stay calm – The behavior may frustrate you, but now is not the time to vent. You want them to focus on your message and their behavior, not your frustration or anger.
By failing to address problem behaviors, leaders get more of them. As noted behavioral analyst Aubrey Daniels said, "Problems in the workplace are often created not by what we do, but by what we fail to do.”
Copyright 2005, Guy Harris
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